Perhaps I went a little overboard. After all, Halloween isn't about scaring people shitless. Its about giving fat kids flavored sugar, right?
Here's a TOP 10 list of what I heard from neighbors as I tromped around the yard, looking ridiculously awesome:
1. From an overprotective mother - "Don't come over here scaring my daughter. That's not what this is about! I'll call the cops on your ass!"
2. From a young child dressed as a princess - "Mommy I'm scared of this one."
3. From the kid across the street - "Do I know you? Ok....you stay right there. RIGHT THERE."
4. From a thug kid about 2 years too old for Halloween - "Awww shit, naw man. Naw man. Is that real?"
5. From thug kid's friend - "Of course he's real, he's breathing."
6. From thug kid again, right after I jumped at him with a fake knife - "Maaaaaaan. Man! Shheeeit, man. Shit" (as he held his hand over his heart)
7. From a cute 5-year old who had NO fear - "Who are you supposed to be?"
8. From a lady who scares too easily - "Oh my god, did you come out of that coffin?! You DID didn't you! Oh no!"
9. From a father/daughter combo - Father is laughing his ass off at my costume, daughter is scared shitless. "Its just a guy in a costume, don't be such a baby. Go get some candy from him!"
10. From another group of hoodrats - "Awwww, you done messed up now! Letting us take whatever candy we want?! Damn, you messed up!" - and they proceeded to take large handfuls of candy...taking all the candy I wanted to get rid of anyway (Laffy Taffy).
See you all again next year, you little bastards!