Saturday, July 7, 2012

Cheeseball Metal Vol. 1: Manowar

Here's a new blog feature to add to the roster. Cheeseball Metal! 

Today, we explore one of the cheesiest bands of all time: Manowar.

NOT GAY ENOUGH.

If that promo picture doesn't tell you all that you need to know about Manowar, perhaps this song will.

"The Gods Made Heavy Metal" (1996) from Louder Than Hell.

Manowar formed in 1980, and they're still around today. They've released 12 albums of pure cheeseball metal, which I'm sure can be found at your torrent site of choice.


Join me next time on Cheeseball Metal where I'll delve into the early days of Pantera, when Dimebag Darrell was known as Diamond Darrell and Phil Anselmo was nowhere to be found. 

Until then, enjoy one last taste of the sweaty loincloth that is Manowar...

"Death Tone" (1982) from Battle Hymns.


Wednesday, July 4, 2012

Covet Corner: The Board Games

Today I celebrate the birth of our country with a celebration of what makes this country great: Consumerism! After all, isn't that what Covet Corner is all about?

This edition of Covet Corner showcases something that I feel is a dying form of entertainment. Behold the wonderful world of board games.

Milton Bradley and the Parker Brothers were some rich-ass motherfuckers.

I can't get into the "new" board games. Take a stroll through the board game isle at any given store. Its downright scary. Games based on TV shows and celebrities fill the shelves at ridiculous prices, while the good classic games are affordable and better.

I've got all the classics there. Candy Land. Sorry! Clue: Master Detective (unfortunately I do not own the original Clue. It's on my own Covet list), Monopoly, Pay Day, Life, Risk, Chess, Yahtzee, Uno, Trivial Pursuit....

I have great memories from childhood for each of these games:

1. Crying in the bathroom because my dad was taking Risk so seriously that he became insanely furious.
2. My mom and I making up our own rules to Aggravation because the real rules were stupid. 
3. Throwing Chess across the room because I'm not patient enough to think 5 moves ahead. 
4. Inventing my own cards for Uno to make the game more interesting.
5. Playing Candyland with the girls at school because Candyland was the only board game they'd ever play.
6. Playing Monopoly by myself, because no-one ever wanted to get into a long game.

The list could go on forever. Ahhhh, the memories!

There's still a few classics that I need to get for the collection, such as the already-mentioned original Clue, as well as Connect Four, Memory, Mouse Trap, Boggle and Guess Who. I wouldn't mind having an original Hungry Hungry Hippos as well, but that's pretty hard to find in good shape these days. 

If you ever come visit the Matt-Cave to bask in its glory...pick a game and we'll rock it old school!

(NOTE: Not pictured above, but still on the shelf....Pick-Up-Sticks. Best game ever.)